I am facing quite a few life changes now. I might have a new diagnosis on top of my indolent systemic mastocytosis (SM), and my daughter is moving nine hours away with my oldest granddaughter, who is 9, and my youngest granddaughter, who is 8 months. I have been dreading this upcoming move for months; moving day is set to happen in just a few more days.
My girls keep me motivated and lift my spirits up by getting me out of the house, even if it is just to make the morning or afternoon school run, a school event, church or just getting outside. As I write this, I can just feel the depression already trying to set in. My two sons and their beautiful families are not far away, but they all lead busy lives and I do not get to see those grandbabies as often as I want. My grandchildren are my world.
As far as the new diagnosis goes, I had a biopsy on my arm recently that showed I might have lupus. I am in the process of being referred to a rheumatologist for this, but it looks like it will be March of 2026 before I can get an appointment. I am still hoping that we can find another appointment with someone else sooner.
These burdens are laying heavy on my heart. I personally rely on God to give me strength, and I have been praying constantly for the strength I need to face what lies ahead of me.
Finding strength
The other night I took my oldest granddaughter to the skating rink for a friend’s birthday party. I was going to be out way past my bedtime, and dreaded going — but for her, of course I made it happen. I was in physical pain as well as mentally drained. I stood off to the side watching her and all her little friends skate around the rink. Though deep inside my heart was breaking, I kept a smile on my face. I thought that I looked happy.
While I was watching my granddaughter, I had an encounter with a stranger that could be called either a random act of kindness or a “God wink.”
You’re probably familiar with random acts of kindness, even if you haven’t heard the phrase. They’re small thoughtful gestures offered to others without expecting anything in return. A God wink, on the other hand, is a remarkable coincidence or divine intervention in a person’s life, which can be interpreted as a sign of hope, encouragement or the divine presence of God.
I have been both the giver and receiver of many random acts of kindness. Whether you are the giver or receiver, there is nothing like it. It lifts your spirits and puts a smile on the faces of both parties. I hope that everyone in their lifetime experiences this feeling.
But I am choosing to believe what happened was a God wink.
As I was standing there watching the children skate thinking that I was putting on the perfect happy front, a young man about 13 years old came off the rink and straight up to me. He looked me straight in the eyes and asked me, “Ma’am, have you had a good day?”
I was startled at the question, and told him that I had. He then told me that I looked so sad that he just wanted to make sure I was having a good day. I gave in and admitted that it was an okay day. Then he told me that I needed to have great days and asked if he could give me a hug. I told him that this was the nicest thing anyone had ever done before, and that I appreciated his gesture more than he could imagine.
What young man at his age notices someone with a smile on her face but a heart that is grieving? This was a stranger, not anyone attending the birthday party.
After the hug he was back out on the rink skating again — and I had a genuine smile.
The smile on my face and the joy in my heart overwhelmed me with emotions. I am so thankful for that young man. I will forever remember this encounter. Whether you choose to believe it was a random act of kindness or a God wink is up to you, but either way, the impact that small gesture had was profound.
To me, it was a divine sign saying, “I still have plans for you, my child. Your work here is not done.” It’s giving me the strength I need for the days and months ahead.
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